I haven’t been in good mood lately and haven’t had much time to read, so everyone, please bear with those meaningless complaints!
I’m currently returning to the school days when I had to use school books to cover the manga I was reading on the QT (on the QT = secretly) – now that I use IELTS materials as concealment for the online novels on my laptop. Sigh, life is pathetic.
It’s because they are dear to me, their discouragement hurts me even more. And the fact that I love them does not mean I cannot get pissed off at them once in a while. They thought that they were doing me a favor by giving out all the things they believed were good for me, but those were what I never asked for nor wanted. They were just imposing their regrets on my life. (Oh please, I’m soooooo f-ing not their Sim!)
The best way to protect one’s heart is to never hold anyone dear, but the task is just too hard that no man on Earth can accomplish. And thus I seclude my consciousness in layers of dreams, deceive and persuade myself that those toxic words which have been deconstructing my inside are resonants the walls of my mind create. Yet in the end, the infrastructure of my self-protecting edifice is of wretched quality and is doomed to collapse any moment.
Sigh, sigh, sigh. Building you and demolishing you are both their jobs. Foe in form of a friend, messenger of abyss wearing a saintly skin, thy name is ‘parent’.
P.S: never mind me, I’m just being stressed about everything and as a natural consequence, being ridiculously poetic.